Sunday, November 13, 2005

Directions For Bill O'Reilly.

I decided instead of ranting about Mr. O'Reilly, I should be helpful.

I want to help Bill O'Reilly, our military, and the war on terror. I know how. Mr. O'Reilly says we are in World War III. He says that subsequently the ability of the military to recruit unabated is the highest priority and that anyone who impedes that is an enemy of the state. He states to stand in the way of the military getting as many soldiers as possible is fascist.

I could not agree more.

We are fighting WWIII and if we don't actively help the military recruit every available citizen (high school kids, etc), then we are no longer Americans. And we should be destroyed. I would enlist myself, but I am gay and am not allowed to serve my country (thanks, Bill Clinton!). However, Mr. O'Reilly is super all-the-way heterosexual and in great physical shape (have you heard the strength in his voice when tells people to 'shut up'... that's power!!). Therefore, I am sure that Mr. O'Reilly wants to be immediately signed up for the U.S. military so that he can help our soldiers win this war sooner and come home to their families. So why hasn't Mr. O'Reilly signed up yet? That's a stupid question! He hasn't had the chance! Oddly enough, the unabated military recruiters in New York don't ever go to the patriotic Fox News headquarters to seek recruits. Very odd. So Mr. O'Reilly likely thinks he has no access to recruiters.

Well, I have good news for him! Mr. O'Reilly may not be aware, but there is an Armed Forces Recruiting Station right in the middle of Times Square, just a few blocks away from the Fox News headquarters in midtown!!! Because I am being so helpful, I thought I would show Mr. O'Reilly exactly where to go. I looked up the directions online for him and saved them for him and his coworkers to head over and make their country proud!



Don't thank me, Bill, your service to your country is thanks enough! :-)

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