Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Chickenhawk Thanksgiving Recipe!

You know what I'm cooking for Thanksgiving?...

CHICKENHAWK!

All you need to prepare this delicious holiday meal is a willingness to endorse military policies your own past shows to be hypocritical. Key ingredients include draft-dodging history, a hardline pro-war stance, and a tendency to smear your enemies as unamerican. Preheat oven to 325°F. Add some butter and light seasoning. Add 1/2 cup water to the bottom of pan, if desired. Insert meat thermometer in thigh, preferably shaped like an American flag. Chickenhawks look much more authentic with flags.

For a truly unique stuffing, I recommend the following:

#1: One serving of Jean Schmidt-
Battle of Words

Three days after Rep. Jean Schmidt was booed off the House floor for saying that "cowards cut and run, Marines never do," the Ohioan she quoted disputed the comments.

Danny Bubp, a freshman state representative who is a colonel in the Marine Corps Reserve, told The Enquirer that he never mentioned Rep. John Murtha, D-Pa., by name when talking with Schmidt, and he would never call a fellow Marine a coward...


#2- A very big serving of Rush "pilonidal cyst" Limbaugh-
Limbaugh: Murtha "just the useful idiot of the moment"

On the November 21 broadcast of his nationally syndicated radio show, host Rush Limbaugh asserted that Rep. John P. Murtha (D-PA) -- who on November 17 called for the immediate redeployment of U.S. forces from Iraq -- is "just the useful idiot of the moment."

Limbaugh added that people "portray [Murtha] as a former hawk," and asked: "What kind of serious hawk calls for withdrawals like this?" Limbaugh then added: "I don't think he ever has been a hawk ... in his career ... as a congressman."


Let cook for 4-5 hours at that temperature. Baste regularly.

[*WARNING: Do not take Oxycontin with chickenhawk. May cause irrational behavior.]

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